I think you have all heard of the Discovery Channel show, "Dirty Jobs," with Mike Rowe as host. Well, I have my own dirty job that I think he should come and check out. Every Saturday, I work as a quail-and-horse farm hand. Now, at first glance that may not sound very dirty, but trust me. It is. My personal agenda consists of this:
1) Clean Razor the snake's cage - try not to get pooped on.
2) Do dog poop patrol (crap cleanup in yard), but first dump out acrid water from bucket you'll be using. Oh, and dump out the 15-odd pounds of dog crap in the blackberry bushes on the side of the yard when done.
3) Feed and water horses, try not to get bitten, kicked, etc.
4) Clean out trays of baby quail crap - try not to inhale stench of quail poop and urine mix
5) Feed and water babies, re-mix any empty cartons of bird water
6) Do any special job the boss wants done (i.e. quail-fetching, baby transferring, etc.)
7) If above jobs do not take up the entire three hours, spend rest cleaning up horse crap in....the field. This includes wading out into a field full of a 4-inch deep mix of horse poop, urine, and mud (try not to let yellow liquid leak into shoes), then shovel poop into the wheelbarrow. When the barrow is full, climb up hill to 2-foot high pile of horse crap and dump contents of the barrow. Repeat until noon.
